This is why you’re fat: Internet Gem?

Or the Internet’s polished turd.

If you haven’t figured out by now this is going to be an Internet Gem, they all are. I don’t write about terrible websites…besides People of Public Transit (no one visits the site but I digress). This is why you’re fat doesn’t have an issue pulling in the views. Typing “this is” into Google autocompletes to This is why you’re fat right behind “This is it,” come on MJ you’re not Tupac. This is why you’re fat: where dreams become heart attacks is a fairly simple website including a title, photo submission, and the fatness. This Internet Gem features “The Irish Hog:” “A deep-fried spiral-cut potato encasing a strip of deep-fried bacon, served with brown sugar BBQ sauce,” “Cheetos Coated In Strawberry Yogurt Glaze,”Chocolate Dipped Potato Chips,” and my personal favorite, visually, “The Steakinator:” “Two 8oz Prime Angus steaks with braised short rib, cheddar cheese, bacon and a fried egg on a toasted cheese and garlic sourdough bun.” Exploring the site for a few minutes, I experience tightening of my chest, shortness of breath, increased heart rate, and a shooting pain in my left arm. After resuscitation and regaining consciousness I take in the overall fugliness of TIWYF. So if you feel depressed about the large meat lover’s pizza you ate alone while wondering why you have no real love in your life, redirect your browser off of your ex’s Facebook page and visit This is why you’re fat, it can only help.

-C

As if WXUT.com didn’t have enough Cam Norton content, Cam Norton.com has even more! Including this article in a different font! Woo!

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